this really happened

I remember when they first took over the world. There were tacos every where. Batman and I were hiding underneath some rocks. We were planning for the taco leader to come near so we could attack. When we saw what we thought was the taco leader Batman jumped out and threw bat stars at him. “Wait,” I yelled, but it was too late they already cut him in half with their razor sharp tomato slices. I decided to run. There were tomato slices whizzing all around me. I pulled out my gun and hid behind a taco shell. I looked up and started shooting. I must have taken down 5 tacos before a piece of lettuce hit my helmet and knocked me out.
When I woke up I was back at the base. “what happened?" I asked. The general answered “One of the men took you back to the base.” “any updates on who or what started this?” “Yes,” said the general “it turns out that the penguins started it. Mr. Penguin is the leader of it. Also, the polar bears joined the war. You will be paired up with Pansy the polar bear. Your next mission is to take out the supplier of the tacos. If you don’t already know who that is, it’s Taco Bell. Any questions?” “Not at the moment.” I replied.
Two days later Pansy and I set out to destroy Taco Bell. We stopped at 7eleven to get some food. When we came out there were burrito tanks everywhere. They started shooting taco sauce. We pulled out some marinara bombs and threw them at the tanks and they started to melt. When we got to Taco Bell there were tanks and anti air quesadillas. We snuck in through the back and placed some Alfredo c4 in the main kitchen. We started running but we got blocked by some tacos. Pansy told me to run while he distracted them. He ran into them and I took a left towards an exit. I got out and kept running. I stopped and turned around the c4 blew up. “Oh well,” I thought “I don’t like polar bears any way.”